Tuesday, July 8, 2014

Wind & Waves

A few weeks ago, a section of verses kept coming up through various avenues: reference verses at church, in personal devotions, in conversations with friends. After about round 4 of this, I decided the coincidence wasn't to be taken lightly and I would memorise them.

I am terrible at memorising anything that isn't a song--not because I can't, but because of the disciplined action I am required to do. I can memorise a song without a second though, no problem, but straight line memorisation has always been a bit of a struggle for me. 

So, I wrote the verses down, and started repeating them back to myself...one at a time. Finally, I got to this verse:

I stopped memorising. I couldn't continue because I felt like I didn't quite understand it. Why would the Lord choose to command and raise the wind which, in turn, lifted up the waves of the sea? I asked God why He didn't just command the waves to be lifted; why didn't He just leave the wind out of it?

I was reminded that His ways are higher and greater than mine and that He chose to use the wind to affect the waves. He could have done it differently, but He didn't.

A man's heart plans his way, But the LORD directs his steps.
Proverbs 16:9 NKJV

I finished that day having memorised one small verse, but having been filled with His peace. I walked away knowing that He was in charge of both the wind and the waves and if He would choose to affect the waves by the wind, who am I to argue?

Then, he caused some wind to rise, the waves were lifted...and, as a sheep gone astray, I forgot all that He taught me.

I had been growing increasingly exciting about a specific ministry opportunity and, seemingly out of nowhere, plans fell through and I was no longer needed to serve there. The wind came up and completely tossed me about like a wave at sea. It wasn't me that changed. It wasn't my plans that were moved, it was something else that happened, but inadvertently affected me...and I didn't like it.

 I thought one way, God thought differently. I thought I knew what was best, God knew better. And not two days after memorising and meditating on Psalm 107:25, I was experiencing it first hand.

It took me a bit of time to be reminded of that peace I had when I first understood this scripture. It took repentance from my frustration and hurt. It took relinquishing my own plans. It took His merciful and gentle voice to calm me and give me a refreshed trust in His direction.

In the end, with the reminder of His Word, I was able to dwell on the times I have been affected like the waves...and the times the Lord has used me as the wind. I felt a peace knowing that regardless of His plans, it was for a greater purpose and I am blessed to be used for and by Him in whatever capacity He chose.

And it has renewed my joy in meditating on scripture and raised my trust in His "cause and affect"actions in my life.