Monday, March 8, 2010

And God said…

Sometimes, the Lord allows things in our lives to go wrong. I can’t say that He takes them from us, but He allows things to be taken. He has done this to me multiple times…and in those times,

I said to the Lord: “Why would you do this? Why would you put me through this?”

And God always said: “Trust me.”

Then, He asks for my heart. He asks us to allow Him to replace that taken thing. He asks for our attitude towards the situation to follow suit to our words of devotion to Him. I tell Him I will always love Him and then when He asks me to surrender the heart behind the “thing”…I hold and cling and grasp and don’t let go. And I tell Him:

“No, Lord. You’ve asked for too much. I can’t give you any more.”

And God says:  “Trust me.”

The moments in my life where the Lord allows Job-like sifting are often the moments where I so badly want to blame God for the pain and the hurt. It’s in those moments that I feel alone, open, humbled (in a there-is-my-pride-staring-me-in-the-face kind of way) and distant. I want to feel those things, but I know I cant.

It’s in those times where I say: “Lord, I can’t do this. Why would you even ask this of me?”

And God responds with: “Trust me.”

Trust is such a hard thing for someone who has grown up being told to expect the worst from people. Trust is not part of the vocabulary of the fearful. Trust is a scary 5 letter word that is more easily forgotten than exercised simply because it is not understood.

Trust is what the Lord asks of us when He tells us that He wants our everything. Even our hearts. Even our memories. He wants it all and we have to trust that when we hand it over…He is going to deal well with it.

You are my family and you know what the Lord has asked of me recently. You are my friends and you have seen me as I grasp at the Lord frantically throughout it all.

I am your sister, daughter, friend, and fellow Christian and I can tell you that The Lord WILL perfect that which concerns me.

…because I know that His mercies endure forever.

because I know that He will not forsake the work of His hands. (Psalm 138:8)

He who called me is faithful…who also will do it. (1 Thes 5:24)

It’s in these times that the Lord smiles and says

“Trust me.”

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

so beautiful.

everything always comes back to trust for me. i KNOW i need to trust Him more than i do...